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Biblical Context

Christian rock is alluded to as early as the book of Isaiah, and is mentioned in the New Testament, in the book of Mark. In chapter 12, Christ does not define Christian rock so much as provide a theological basis for it:

(17) And Jesus said to them, "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's. And render unto the people the most wicked awesome music of all, that they may hear My word." And they were amazed at Him. (18) Some Sadducees came to Jesus, and began questioning Him, saying, (19) "Teacher, Moses wrote for us that if a man's brother dies and leaves behind a wife and leaves no child, his brother should pick up a guitar and play some funky riffs. (20) There are seven funky riffs I can play, and I love them all equally, and I will play them to You now." [In verses 21 through 23, the chords are played and the Bible shows musical staffs which cannot be reproduced on Uncyclopedia.] (24) Jesus said unto them, "Is this not the reason that we can totally rock out? Here, my prophet Luke will bring a drum set."

September 2017

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